Dear Suzie, hi this really cute boy asked me out and i said yes so i really like him and he really likes me but the problem is that i sound to sexy for him.
he has a sked me to have sex at his house when its only me and him but iam really scared and shy cause i dont want to get pregnat other wise my parents would kill me amd him but i really love him and iam scared he is going to say no to me if i say i dont want to have sex and i really dont want to break up with him hese in year 10 and iam in year 9 but hese really buff help me whta should i do plz give me some tips bye
Say no. Say no, no, no. Year 9? You’re 12, maybe 13. He’d be breaking the law having sex with you – to the point of risking being put on the Sexual Offenders Register if you’re 12 even if he too is 13 or 14.
Laws tend to be there for good reasons. However grown up you may feel, the law on sexual consent exists to protect you from going too far, too soon. You tell me he’s buff and cute as if this is a reason to do anything he asks. As if he has a god given right to have you take your knickers off simply because he’s good looking; or simply because he’s a good catch and you want to show off you’ve caught him.
You may think snaffling a cute, buff boy will do your rep good. What sort of a rep do you think you’ll have when he’s had you and finished with you? It may be horribly unfair but the double standard still rules; boys who shag around are Kings, girls who do are sluts. Having sex when you’re a teenager is all very well, but it’s only something you can look back on with pride when;
- You really are old enough to make a proper decision
- You and the boy really, really care for each other
- You and the boy have talked over contraception and agreed what type you’ll use together
You mention love. Okay – let’s talk about love. You need to love and be loved if you’re going to have sex. And the truth is that if a boy loved you, he’d hate to do anything that would hurt you. You say you love him but are scared he’ll break up with you if you say no to sex. It’s a good test. If you say no and he throws you over, he would have been a pig if you had said yes.
But that test is something you use when you are older. A lot older. For now, you say no. No, not because your parents would kill you if you got pregnant but because it’s something you really, really don’t want to be doing while you’re in year 9. Or 10, 11 or maybe even 12 for that matter. Save it for when you meet the right guy who cares about you and for you and for when you’re not doing it to show off or keep him.
For now, tell him you really like him, want to go on seeing him but sex is out of the question. then, see if he’s a Prince or a pig. If he’s a prince then you’ll see you don’t have to do what you think a boy wants to stay with him. And if he’s a pig, heave a sigh of relief you made your escape!